keeping it real

Okay Kristi because you were so complimentary in my last post I immediately was chagrined because I totally retouched myself before putting the picture up. I got rid of a lot of hyperpigmentation on my cheek and lightened the darkness and boney hollow look around my eye. So here's the unretouched version, the look the same small but if you click on them when they're enlarged there's a big difference. The healing brush in PhotoShop is amazing! I want a healing brush for my life. Maybe that could be my power if I was a superhero, Owen and I talk about this a lot, what power we would want. Whenever I come into some money, be it powerball or charity, I'm running to the dermatologist for Fraxel and I'm getting these shoes in olive. Even in my wildest dreams I have to be practical with a 2 3/4" wedge heel because I know I can't do anything higher.

I mentioned to Kristi in a comment that I want to look like one of these Garnet Hill fantasy moms, on the left here. Whenever I get the Garnet Hill catalog I'm so excited but at the same time I know I'll be so disappointed. Margot Kidder's daughter wrote an article in Vogue a couple months ago and one line stayed with me. Comparison is lethal to contentment. Are there Moms who don't compare themselves to others constantly? I mean aside from Angelina Jolie? On another note, catalogs where kids are props to women's fashion sort of crack me up in their creepiness. I like to imagine the model storming off to swig a red bull & chain smoke after the picture was taken.

But, I seriously covet so many of the clothes in Garnet Hill and Boden, where I found this cheeky monkey, in her green beret and cute polka dot scarf. Is she going to let her hubby take care of the kids while she stands there and strikes a skinny ass pose. How can you give birth to two children and have hips that narrow?! What Mom would honestly look that serene and well rested without medication involved. And the whole family is so matchy matchy. I don't know, I think Boden might be a little too colorful for me. I like the stuff for girls over the stuff for women.

But, I do think Boden wins for creepiest kid as prop award. They seem to favor cropping their faces off with the background. Was half of a young boy's face really necessary to sell this henley? What do you think is going on here? No, Jasper. Mummy has had enough of the playdates and piano lessons and soccer and for fuck's sake chess club?! It's my turn now and I'm going on this hayride solo, well except for the flask of gin I've got tucked in my hot pink pants! Just be a dear Jasper and let Mummy have her moment.