holidaze

Saturday was my birthday and, as an adult, having a birthday that falls anywhere between Thanksgiving and New Year's just sucks. I can't even say it's all about that other guy's birthday, not BradPitt but Jesus, because it doesn't seem to be about him either. All I see is compulsive consumption; buying presents people can probably live without, going into debt, gaining holiday weight, maybe weathering a hangover or two and you come into the new year bleary eyed, bloated and broke.

I had a bit of a Sixteen Candles moment this weekend. My Mother-in-law forgot my birthday - sounds like the title of some self-help book "My Mother-in-law forgot my Birthday: How to make nice when you want to raise Hell." I told Toby maybe I'll get more money out of her because she'll feel contrite for her oversight but I don't think that's gonna happen now that Toby told her just that the other night. She wanted to talk to me after Toby informed her that she missed my birthday. When I took the phone she went on about how she had just celebrated their friend Steve Coral's birthday the other day and she celebrated her Mom's birthday Friday but she didn't even have me written down on her calendar. I know Toby's Mom tends to lack an internal editor, she just sort of says what she thinks and God help the feelings that might get hurt, but even though I know that about her, saying all that just made me feel worse, like I was somehow to blame for not being memorable enough. I just said I was surprised because I thought my birthday would be pretty easy to remember since it's the day before her Mother's (wouldn't you think?!) but that I knew it's easy to forget things when everyone is so busy with holiday stuff.

Which brings me to the other Sagittarian who had a birthday, Brad Pitt. I look at the photo of them in front of Fallingwater and I'm struck by a few things...

1. Does Angelina Jolie ever look bad or frumpy? I had wanted to get a winter white coat this year (yes, I'm finally thinking of retiring my Burton snowboard coat which I have had for nine, yes nine, years) but thought better of it since I have children. I imagined it quickly becoming soiled with various food & Oona body fluid stains, and I have twenty pounds I could stand to lose so winter white would read like this on me.

2. Do Angelina & Brad realize the VIP treatment they got at Fallingwater? They were allowed to have lunch in the living room, so I'm assuming they sat on some furniture, and they had a fire going in the living room. When we took a tour of Fallingwater this fall I was reprimanded for having a large purse and told to keep it in front of me at all times so I didn't bump anything, they're so hyper-vigilant that no one touch any of the original furnishings. But I'd rather they get the VIP treatment as opposed to say all the vapid dingbats (Britney, Paris, Lindsay ...) that get press and preferential treatment. At least Angelina & Brad do stuff with their fame, use it as a catalyst for philanthropy and possibly, hopefully, inspire others to make a positive change in the World.

3. That house looks amazing in all the different seasons. It really is a wondrous place BUT when I was on the tour all I could think was 'this place is beautiful and I could never live here with kids.' The wall of the balcony on the second floor came up to just above my knee. When I looked over the wall I had to crouch down because I started experiencing vertigo. (Truth be told, during the first week we had our new car I was experiencing vertigo when I drove it down steep parts on the highways out here. I had to get used to being up higher in a vehicle.) Am I the only freaky parent that has visited Fallingwater and shuddered envisioning their toddler falling off the balcony to the hard, slick rocks far below? I just looked up Fallingwater in my favorite reference resource, Wikipedia, and learned of structural problems inherent in the design, thank God I didn't visit the home before 2002!

So I'll come full circle and end with ruminations about this past birthday... I got my haircut, which was good. Owen said I looked silly, which wasn't great but it was a predictable response from a boy seeing his Mom suddenly look different. I've got to put any expectations of my 'big day' aside but putting expectations aside can be so hard even with the best intentions. I got some yummy desserts from Whole Foods for my birthday after enjoying a perfect bacon, cheeseburger with my favorite people (my family) and my favorite beer a Black & Tan, that got me very buzzed. I just don't drink that much anymore, I love to have a beer or glass of red wine every once in a while but nowadays all the alcohol does to me is make me very sleepy. So I'm 38... a year older, more tired, have some aches that I wish I didn't, still a nutcase with worrying, but overall happy and healthy.