My Grandma died yesterday morning. My Mom called me at 5:20 before I went to the hospital for the day. Not the best time to let me know but I guess there's never a good time for learning someone you love has died. She had just been transferred from the assisted living facility she had been living at for over four years (over two of them while on hospice) to Forbes regional hospice located within West Penn hospital. At least her last hours were in a facility that provided her peace. Unlike the assisted living facility where she would get agitated at night and no one would give her medication to alleviate her pain or anxiety because there was no LPN or RN on staff at that time. So she stayed up all night and suffered, we found out last week. I know it's a looong way off but please think of your parents, your loved ones, yourself. Consider a skilled nursing facility before you go to an assisted living center. Over the past week my grandma would keep repeating 'please don't hurt me.' it's not a memory you want, worrying about who might have hurt her or what exactly happened to scare her so. And hospice, be careful which one you choose, more than that, ask for another nurse if you get some religious whack job taking care of you or your loved one who doesn't believe in being liberal with the morphine or thinking it's premature to put someone on continuous care, because when a person is actively dying they are in a lot of pain and agitation and for God's sake be a wee bit compassionate and give them the morphine and ativan they require. My Grandma was under 80 pounds and a month shy of 96, that her life was dragged out to literally dying bit by bit is a travesty and something I hope no one else ever suffers through or watches a loved one suffer through. I love you Grandma. I hope you're finally at peace now. You were so darn nervous but such a dear sweet, smart beautiful lady. I truly hope you realize the gift you were now.
5 comments:
i am so sorry. what a beautiful lady she was. i see where you get it from.
love and hugs across the miles.
So sorry to hear about your grandmother. Mine died this month too, she was 98 yrs old. I am so sad that yours had to suffer at the end. It did get me to open up a conversation with my parents about their end of life desires and maybe needs.
Oh, Kim. I am so sorry for your loss, but glad she is at last at peace. I know how you worried. I also once again thank the powers that be for the dear, wonderful, kind doctor who on the qt explained to me, worrywart that I was, that the higher the (legal) dose of morphine, the more depressed her breathing would become, and the more peacefully she could slip away. she helped my mom die peacefully and without pain, in a reasonably timely manner. And i think of her gratefully so very often, but especially when I hear stories like your grandma's.
Hi
I am sorry to hear for your loss. I hope she is at peace now and you as well since this was a hard on you too.
You were so amazing and caring and thank goodness she had you.
I think you should consider trying to publish some articles about what you witnessed and nursing homes/assisted living facilities in general.
Hugs to you.
that's a beautiful pic and post of your grandmom. I'm sending you hugs from philly. so sorry for what you all had to endure and I am grateful for the peace she has now. she was lucky to have such a committed loving sensitive granddaughter. I'm sure she was very proud of you as you are of her. lots of love.
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