bite your tongue

I was all set to write a post about this woman I got a massage from yesterday, who is a little out there but her massages are incredible, truly. And she'll offer little plums of wisdom while working on knots, like the huge one lodged in my right tmj area (I can't wear my bite guard anymore because I've ground it into a serrated knife that hurts my tongue when I wear it, in seven months time) You're holding back on saying things tell me about it I managed to say. Oh. My. God. I'm a flipping people pleaser, I've held my tongue so many times I think it's why The Namesake appealed to me so much as a book because I could understand the characters so well, especially Moushumi Mazoomdar when she described her obedient, bookish, desperately lonely years in college. She had harbored lengthy infatuations, with students with whom she never spoke, with professors and TAs. In her mind she would have relationships with these men, structuring her days around chance meetings in the library, or a conversation during office hours, or the one class she and a fellow student shared, so that even now she associated a particular year of college with the man or boy she had silently, faithfully, absurdly, desired. I'm like that now but my imaginary conversations can be much more pedestrian, like just talking to people instead of being this mute dork who panics around men. I don't even need to be romantically interested, although that ups the dork factor exponentially, I just am a complete silent spaz around the opposite sex from ages 18 to 55. But I digress, I wanted to sing the praises of the masseuse but dropping the kids off at school today I bent over to help Oona out of her seatbelt and whacked my head against the car. I don't know how I managed this, it was like I suddenly was half a foot taller or unable to negotiate my body space with a coffee mug in my hand. I think I might have gotten a small concussion, I definitely have a bump (fortunately just where the hairline starts) but the worst was I wrenched my neck backward and any residual body yumminess from the massage just blew away with that blow to the head. Ugh. Oona is such a dear though, when she saw that I hurt myself she got all worried, making little whimpering sounds as she wrapped her arms around my legs hugging me. She can't bear to see those close to her in any pain, physical or otherwise.

So the bump might have affected me more than I know because this post isn't really following a coherent thought. As long as I don't wake up to find what I've typed to be illegible though I figure I'm okay. Here is documentation, as if you needed any, of my compulsive nature. Two weeks into knitting five scarves down.
Scarf prototype. I had this yarn for twelve years, it's a good colored scarf for the fall/halloween season.
I made this one for Oona, although she doesn't seem particularly interested in wearing it, which is okay because I remember some John Cheever short story about a girl wearing a scarf who is killed when it gets caught in the t-bar skiing, I think that's how it goes I read that story in college, gulp, probably twenty years ago!

I've had enough of my face. I like this green but I think I'm going to have to start making cashmere scarves, my skin is so sensitive my neck is getting really itchy from these soft wool blends. No real surprise, when I exercise after having gone a few days without my skin will itch (I can't believe some people can get anaphylaxis from this, yikes)

And here's a blue blend, double strand, chunky yarn and fat needles are the way to go for knitting newbies. This scarf was done in three hours.

This orange blend is just like the blue one above it (and you can see it hanging out as a skien in the loden picture). Lion brand homespun yarn from Joann, no frills. This photo doesn't do the many beautiful color variations in the scarf justice. I got some beautiful pale blue alpaca and another super soft (hopefully not itch inducing) wool in this lovely heathered wine color,This Christmas will be the year of the scarf, and I got a crochet hook because I really really want to be able to make afghans, Christmas 2010 might be the year of the afghan. Pittsburgh winters are cold and I'd rather have a bunch of pretty afghans than a bunch of snuggies for all. Okay now I really need to stop procrastinating and start studying for this Clep test. The academic monkey on my back, I need this done before my birthday (5 weeks give or take).