discombobulated

I'm taking a break from studying for my Microbiology test, which I have tomorrow and fear might ruin my 4.0 streak in school (my professor is a bit of a wild card and I like my professors to be cogent on gelling together all the confusing science stuff). But in other news I got into Duquesne's second degree nursing program - yeah! Bad news, I now have to come up with $37,000 for tuition (yeah, that's for one year of school) plus an additional $5,000 or so to cover childcare expenses for the kids, since they'll be in before and after care most likely. Sooo... I put this SOS on my facebook but I figure it can't hurt to bombard as many people as possible. If you know of any scholarships for second degree nursing students (very hard to come by, most scholarships are for people without a bachelor's) please please please let me know.

In other news, I'm bored with prokaryote vs eukaryote so I thought I'd show you my favorite skirt. Really you might say? This skirt is 15 years old, bought it in NYC at French Connection after leaving library studies grad school in Austin. Oh the many dead ends I've taken in life. I have worn this thing pretty consistently since then and would love to make copies of it, it's so comfy, if not the most flattering. That waist photo is to show you that the waistband has completely stretched out after 15 years, and I did live in this the first four months that I was pregnant with Owen. It's some sort of jersey/lightweight wool and it's in my favorite color grey! I own so many grey clothes it's pathetic, it's my kinder version of basic black. In other news thesee photos are awful and they come from my 12 megapixels camera! I can't figure out how to get good indoor shots without them being extremely grainy. Don't tell me I'm going to have to crack open the manual - when I say I like point and shoot camera I mean it, no learning from a book I want my camera to be completely intuitive and goof proof, is it too much to ask?

valentine's date

So Owen had his first official valentine's day date, well, officially it was the day after valentine's, but still he's only six. And, my goodness, I know he's my son but how could you turn down a date who looks so earnest? So he brought the red chocolate rose and a pokemon valentine's card and he received a lovely hand drawn card, illustrated with a picture of the young couple from his date. She kissed Owen three times before the date, he didn't protest, just stood there with this dazed smile on his face. Me and the other Mom chaperoned the kids to an afternoon viewing of Hotel for Dogs. Can I just rant here that I wound up spending $14 for a kid's snack pack, small soda ($4.25?!) and pack of Twizzlers. I'm going to become one of those people my children are embarrassed by, bringing my own snacks to movies. I actually brought a sandwich from Panera into a movie once with Owen and he was convinced I was breaking the law and would be arrested and I had to reason with him that I didn't think that would happen. Maybe I'd be told to throw away my turkey bravo, at most kicked out of the movie, but I don't think they can arrest me for that. They talked before the film but as soon as the movie came up they basically ignored each other they were so engrossed in the movie. The other mom nudged me at one point and I noticed that Owen's date teared up during an especially emotional scene. I looked over at Owen to see if he was crying and he had his head buried in his popcorn bag - food trumps tears I guess. I just thinks they're so cute together, it's all so innocent. Owen will talk about marrying Alex or having children and being a good Dad, in a weird way it's like a scene in The Office when Michael Scott is a child and talks about wanting a family with lots of kids because they would have to love him.
This one photo of Owen and Alex cracks me up. Owen looks like his chest is puffed up and Alex has a toy saw in her hand, ahh romance. She's a very sweet girl and look how pink her lips and cheeks are naturally. Oh, Owen is such a lovable goofball. I look at him now and already my claws start to come out thinking about the future and when a girl hurt his feelings. But I can't be a toxic in-law, it's just that he's so darn sensitive and nice.

i am so tired of being cold

scenes from the 'hood

And by 'hood I mean from my front door. Ahhh, nothing says 'class' like a grenade decal on a truck. It's the little things you happen upon throughout your day that can put a spring in your step or make you wish that you had superhuman powers to obliterate things in your path just by staring at them hard enough. It shouldn't surprise you that this charming truck driver lives with the owner of the F-150 from this post of yore. I know I shouldn't get angry about this stuff, I should see it as a potential challenge because when I'm a nurse I will have to deal with all kinds of people. BUT, big but, the dude is in his twenties and has this monstrous truck idling for like twenty minutes. I rarely warm up my car and I have little children! You are the chum in the ocean of environmentalists, scumbag!

Owen's school had a fundraiser where you buy chocolate roses for Valentine's Day and Owen is very excited to be going on a Valentine's date this weekend. I'll chaperone the couple to a movie, think I could convince them to go see Slumdog Millionaire. Now I bought the 6 roses, three red chocolate (yuck) and three milk chocolate, because I thought he'd bring them on the date as a candy bouquet. But he gave Oona a red one right after we picked him up at school yesterday, it might seem like a sweet thing to do but he feels the same way I do about red chocolate, then he opened a milk chocolate up for himself. He's planning on presenting his date with 1 red chocolate so I can plan on watching Owen and Oona duke it out over the remaining three. Owen's older but Oona is cunning, she swiped the bag of roses this morning wanting one for breakfast and when I denied her a horrible tantrum ensued. Here she is in happier times, looking like the joker. Lately she does this horrible fake laugh that would really add a bit of toddler menace to this look.

This is a testament to my dorkiness that whenever I stumble upon my two cats, Frodo & Sam, curled up together the Secret Lovers song by Atlantic Star goes through my head. It's sort of like the llama ad for me, yet another thing that will make me laugh when I think about, God knows you can't have enough of those. I try to store up all those things that make me laugh to use as diffusers when driving or waiting in an endless line at the grocery store (I have a knack for picking the line that's the slowest). Now if only these mental diffusers would work when my kids push me to the brink.

Secret lovers, yeah, that’s what we are
Trying so hard to hide the way we feel
‘Cause we both belong to someone else
But we can’t let go
‘Cause what we feel is, oh, so real
So real, so real, so real, so real

My Grandmother is a sweet, polite, appreciative, nervous 93 year old. And she's like a cat with nine lives. She's been close to dying a number of times since this fall but just when you think it's the end for her she turns a corner and perks back up. Don't get me wrong, cognitively she's declined greatly since she broke her hip last May and since the fall she really hasn't been able to walk at all, but she has a tremendous drive and somehow keeps on going. I saw her over the weekend and was concerned because she felt warm and was breathing very quickly and shallowly. I summoned help, a nurse came in and determined that she had a fever and her respiration was over twice what it should be with a quick pulse too. I don't know that she realized who I was but I did her nails and she appreciated it when I held her hands or patted her delicate head. Her hands are so tiny. I have pretty bony hands and mine look like a linebacker's next to hers. They're so frail but beautiful in their own way. It is a cruelty to die bit by bit. It is a travesty how the elderly are treated in this country. I just hope that she's not sad or in pain and that when she does pass that it's peacefully and hopefully I'll be there so she's not alone when she dies.

tagged

Okay, even though Kristi Bennett was rooting for the Cardinals I will forgive her that lapse in judgement and say how flattered I was when she tagged me for this project. You're truly a blogger I could see being friends with since I only follow you and the other blogs I read are from people I already know. Hopefully you all know that I'm completely kidding about the sports reference. Funny side note, I went to get Toby a some beer from the bar three blocks up the street from us a couple months ago and was gagging as soon as I entered it was so darn smoky. A Steelers game was on and a rather 'seasoned' (in years as well as drinks) man was trying to chat me up about the game.
him: 'Are you a fan?'
me: 'Gosh, I don't really follow football.'
him: 'Why don't you take a seat and watch the game for a while.'
me: 'I'm getting these (gesture to beer) for my husband.'
him: 'nuff said.'
He was probably just being friendly, but I lack even the most rudimentary flirting skills. After I came home, I gave Toby his beer and promptly took a shower to remove the smoky bar stench from my five minutes in there.

Okay... so now more about the photo tagging. The directions are: Go to your image file, find the fourth folder, and post the fourth picture. This will look familiar, it's one I cropped and photoshopped a wire out of for a picture earlier in the year (love those 12 megapixels). Okay I have to help copy edit the D- Digest, the monthly newsletter that our PTA puts out and my friend Kathleen does an amazing job on this. Hope to catch a Frontline on Parkinson's at 9 since I love learning about all things brain related.

I am tagging the pen and the poop, rambling mommy and babel babe I would tag Nancy but Kristi already got her. And can I just say there are no time limits on the tagging. I always feel awful guilt forwarding or tagging people because I'm just a big worrier, never want to make people feel bad/mad. It's hard in the virtual world unless you put an emoticon after every darn sentence so all I'm saying is no pressure (don't know an emoticon for that one).

hello february

The month is shaping up to be quite a good one for western pa, what with all the exposure, the Steelers winning the Super Bowl and today Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow so there will be 6 more weeks of winter (no huge surprise there, it's more like ten weeks in this part of the country). I am not a big sports follower but did watch the game last night and it was quite nerve wracking. Owen and I were hugging each other during the real tense parts, we're very similar in being nervous, emotive TV watchers. Whew, at one point, right before the Cardinals scored in the 4th quarter I mentioned to Toby feeling bad for Warner since it was most likely his last Super Bowl game and I tend to be a lover of underdogs, like my son. But Toby's like 'Don't say that! If anyone in this city finds out our house will be burnt down.' Then they scored and we both looked at each other thinking how awful it would be in this city if the Steelers lost and I am one of those silly people who winds up worrying that I might have jinxed the team by watching the game or saying something negative, I know it's illogical but those guilty feelings prey upon the best of us neurotic people. Neither Toby or I is into watching sports but he's right about the Steeler pride in Pittsburgh and how bleak things would be here had they lost. It was a great game to watch and it was pretty funny that I was trying to explain what was going on with all the flags to my son. I was a cheerleader in high school and never really followed the football games, I always liked the soccer boys better (and we cheered for them too). Boy, those refs have they're work cut out for them. And I have to say I was bowled over by Harrison's 100 yard touchdown but very disappointed when I saw him punch a Cardinal (he did get penalized with unnecessary roughness) that was not very sportsmanlike at all. Yeah, so I'm sort of like Miss Manners watching the Super Bowl, and I don't want anyone to get hurt. If I got hit by any of those players I'd be a pile of broken bones on the field. Thank God Owen does karate and not football.